here I am.... | greengal777's Blog

I find that alot of people lately having been saying to me...when God closes a door He opens a window.   Well, basically, I am wondering why he closed the door in the first place. I mean if the door was working well why close it anyways???? This saying I  think is said way too much and becomes trite and meaningless. I have asked many fairly intelligent people to explain to me what they think this statement means and they stumble over their words. I am starting to feel after many years of hard times and things being lost from me that God truly thinks I am not worth it and I am starting to feel like any tough effort I make will just have me falling on my face again (and it won't be the first time) I still hold on to this brief, small hope that I will get a little window that I could maybe call for help from as the building that gave me security and comfort burns down around me. I want to make progress and find some degree of satisfaction and peace but it is constantly eluding me.. I trust that one day I will be able to hold on to it and gain strength from it but for now... its far away....I know I am not the only one feeling this way... but I am tired of the hurt and the exhaustion in struggling for goals I may not reach.....thanks for listening..